Results tagged “advertising” from Birmingham Mail - Technobabble

So you're sitting in an advertising meeting. You're a highly paid executive who has been employed because you always come up with the right idea.

You've got a new product to sell. Yes it's a snazzy mobile phone holder which sticks to the windscreen of the car.

What do you do - yes! I've got it - a woman pointing to her husband as he cleans the window (or maybe it's an Albanian asylum seeker who has swooped at the traffic lights with a squeegie bottle and sponge.) Customer: "I'll take ten please!".

Next after the success of your previous campaign you've got a huge budget to spunk - what do you do? That's right hire a 'hip' celebrity. I know - a rapper - Usher!

What next? Ah, just get him to hold the bloody thing and make 'gangsta' hand signs. No wait! Let's go for broke and get him holding TWO phones! That'll slay 'em:

Laptops are cool - people use them for social networking. Our ones are so cool young people would stand NEXT to each other socially networking on them instead of talking. Cool.

Finally what sells? Sex sells that's what! Get a lovely in her pants, stick a phone in her hand. Tell her: "Look Sexy." Wait for the orders to flood in. If not, a job on the Daily Star awaits.

I got a press release through the other day from IGA Worldwide "the leading independent in-game advertising network".

They've just signed a deal with EA, or Electronic Arts, to provide all their plugging for the Playstation 3.

According to the bumph the contract means the 13 million PS3 owners will now be bombarded with in-game advertising.

The release says: "Sony recently opened its PS3(TM) platform to allow brands to advertise dynamically within games played on the popular video game console."

Well that was nice of Sony wasn't it? (I particularly like the TM thrown in like a breeze block emphasizing the product).

I enjoyed the explanation of why gamers would actually benefit from the experience: "The advertisements are integrated within the gaming environment in order to deliver a seamless and more authentic game environment."

Well, I suppose they're right - being bombarded with product placement is certainly part of normal everyday life.

I remember when the only ads in games were spoof ones - often in something like Duke Nukem there'd be pics of naked women advertising something - god knows what - it wasn't big, it wasn't clever, but at least it was (slightly) funny (if you were an adolescent male that is).

Will this 'advance' keep prices down for PS3 gamers (normal release price £49.99) - errr, no.

And EA, for god's sake. They are hardly famous for insisting on finished products being released.

Who can forget Battlefield 2 on PC - still getting massive bug fix patches YEARS after its release.

Elizabeth Harz, EA's Senior Vice President said: "EA is committed to providing both great entertainment experiences for consumers and effective advertising solutions for marketers."

It's come to something when a games publisher says it's 'committed' to a concept like 'creating effective advertising solutions'.

I await the first in-game ad break.

Adverts - coming to a game near you!