HULK SULK

I BUMPED into a friend of mine in town today - and he took me to task over my review of The Incredible Hulk yesterday.

'How could you give that three stars?' he said. 'It was awful'.

Sorry, Ian - but I reckon I got it just about right.

Yes, the script isn't very good. And, yes, there are problems, with scaling. But it will be perfectly watchable for many (our main definition of three stars) and at least it doesn't feel butt-achingly long like Ang Lee's 138-minute version five years ago.

My What's On colleague Andy Coleman is a big fan of comics - he's still learning to read long words despite having an unnatural affinity for Welsh Wales - and he was urging me to give the film FOUR stars! (Steady on, mate).

And Roz Laws, who probably wouldn't be seen dead with the The Beano in her paws, is going to give The Incredible Hulk four stars in tomorrow's edition of our Sunday Mercury sister paper.

Some nationals I've seen have awarded Hulk two stars, so I reckon I'm just about in the right place.

Not too high for those who hate it, not too low for those who'll love it... and bang on the mark for those who want to see a bit of nonsense.

As for Ian, I've suggested he uses his £11.99 per month Cineworld Unlimited card to see how long he can suffer The Happening for.

That will definitely make The Incredible Hulk seem like it's worth three stars.

And give him a good idea of what I have to suffer. Cherry pickers can have too much of a good thing!