After a really fantastic time in Toronto John and I spent 7 hours sitting and waiting in Toronto Airport for our plane back to Newark. The sun was shining, the snow was clearing so no problems we thought. Wrong! high winds were preventing the planes which were little 50 seaters from taking off. Our flight home to England was leaving at 7pm and when we finally boarded a plane at 5.30pm we thought the 1hour trip might just make it, if not the threat of sleeping in Newark Airport was becoming a reality again.We landed on time but maintenance didn't bring the steps for 15 minutes and as we all waited stifling on the plane with no air conditioning frustration and despair set in - we had no chance! Finally we were free and we ran like we have never run before and arrived at the boarding gate hot and dishevelled at 7pm sure that we would find it empty. I truly believe that someone up there is looking after me because the plane was delayed by 15 minutes and so we caught it and were homeward bound to England at last.

I had thoroughly enjoyed the festivities of Xmas and on the night we returned John and I opened all our Xmas presents that we had left under the tree and it felt like Xmas all over again, but now it was "back to reality".

I had 2 hospital visits that week the first was on New Year's Eve when I went to have a bone scan at Heartlands Hospital. Chemo and steroids had caused problems with my bones and I had been having pains down the spine for some time. As you have probably gathered if you have been watching my video diaries of my journey with chemo, I try not to let these things affect my life, but when you are a cancer patient you can't afford to take risks so my doctor sent me for a scan.

The department had been completely revamped and had a brand new scanner. We are so lucky to have access to excellent hospital facilities here in Solihull and Birmingham.. A friend's grandchild has to travel 4 hours to her nearest hospital to have regular kidney dialysis where she lives in England.

I was greeted by the team of Matt and Julia and they were so friendly and kind. This makes all the difference to your hospital experience. I was injected with a radio active dye and sent away for 4 hours, so I popped to see my brother John who kindly house and cat sat for us. He announced he was going back to Australia at the end of the week to catch some sun and I can't blame him. When I returned to hospital I went through the new scanner which completed the job in less than half the time of the old one - such is progress and after wishing each other cheery "Happy New Years" I went home to prepare to enjoy our New year with our friends Jean and Ray who cooked us a lovely hot curry and we toasted in the New Year full of hopes and dreams for a better life and a better world.

I was due to see Professor Poole, my oncologist at University Hospital Coventry and Warwickshire on Friday, 2nd January to see if he thought I should start chemo again. This is a new hospital for me but my oncologist left City Hospital to have a baby and I have great faith in Professor Poole so I transferred so I could be under him - so to speak! I had a phone call to say it was cancelled so I am now going tomorrow and I am just as nervous as ever.

Tonight is the start of our Solihull Cancer Support Group and our speaker is Mr. Budhoo who is a colorectal surgeon. He saved my Mom's life several years ago when he diagnosed her with bowel cancer when everyone else in the medical profession had missed it. He has also helped me over the last year, so it will be a privligege to hear him speak. The speakers are always fascinating - never depressing and I always learn so much and the people who support it are so jolly and friendly and we would really welcome new faces.

The joy of being on holiday for a cancer patient is that you can actually forget that you have cancer, no one knows your problems and you can live normally. That is a tonic in itself.
My friend Sandra, who has ovarian cancer like myself has just finished chemo and is off for a well earned holiday in South Africa next week. She and her husband Alan are coming to our house on Sunday for drinks so we can show them all the places we went to and give them some tips, I know it will make me want to go back again, but in the meantime let's see what tomorrow brings.

P.S. You probably noticed that I managed to put photos on my blog from Canada, that was thanks to my son Jonathan. I am still struggling to find out how to do it so if any of the team at the Birmingham Mail can help me I should really love to be able to put photos on so that I am not just a faceless person.

Xmas Eve and Jaimie and I trudged through the snow to the Supermarket and butchers to get food for Xmas and that important turkey.It was so strange being thousands of miles away from home and yet people here are preparing to have Xmas just like we do in England.I have always entertained at Xmas and am usually running around like a maniac shopping and preparing everything before going to midnight mass so it felt very strange having nothing to do but to relax. That afternoon we went down to the cinema in the basement and watched the film "The Bucket List". It was very poignant about two strangers who meet in hospital after both being diagnosed with terminal cancer and they made a list of all the things they wanted to do before they die. That's what I did 7 years ago when I was given such a short time to live and I thought aren't I lucky to be here and still making my "bucket list".

Xmas Day was snowy and crisp and after opening our presents and having a great meal cooked by Jaimie,John and I ventured out for a walk and watched children tobogganing down the slopes and the local people taking their dogs for a walk. Nearly everyone seems to have a dog in The Beaches area and there are numerous doggy shops and parlours. They obviously are very fond of "man's best friend" in Toronto. After exhausting ourselves playing games and much merriment and copious drinks we all tumbled into bed happy that we could share a lovely Xmas Day together.

Boxing Day we ventured to Lake Ontario where the temperature drops dramatically and the odd lone seagull and the black squirrels were desperately searching for food.Just before we we went out on the night to dinner Jonathan shouted to me "racoons" and as I dashed up from the basement there were 2 racoons in the road that shot up the tree frightened by the headlights of a car.They are shy creatures and not seen very often so I felt very privileged to see them,

The next day was raining and grey and the beautiful white snow took on a dirty black hue as we journeyed on a tram to the centre of Toronto. Part of my Xmas present from Jonathan was a pre theatre meal and then a night at the ballet to see The Nutcracker at the ultra modern glass theatre.I knew that John hated ballet and so did Jonathan, which made it all the more special that he had chosen to do this for me, but everyone thoroughly enjoyed the performance. It was very different from the Nutcracker that I see every year by The Birmingham Royal Ballet and probably not as magical, but I loved the whole experience.
I took Jaimie to see it last year in Birmingham, who would have believed a year on we would be watching it in Canada.

The next day sadly we had to say goodbye all too soon as Jonathan and Jaimie took us to Toronto airport for our flight home.They had made our stay so special that I knew I was going to miss them, but we took with us wonderful memories, I said to John "Our flight home can't be as bad as the one coming" - how wrong can you be!!

5am Monday morning and bleary eyed I crawl out of bed to catch the flight to Toronto. My brother John is staying at our house to look after Chloe our cat and after stocking up the fridge and making the house welcoming I can at last relax as my son Justin takes us to Birmingham airport. All is going smoothly and we wave him a fond farewell only to be confronted by a massive queue on the Toronto flight, this doesn't look too good. When we get to the desk we discover our flight is delayed due to bad weather in Newark and we are going to miss our connection and the next flight they can put us on is 6.45am the following day!

With at least 6 hours to wait, we remember that all the toileteries, toothbrush etc have gone into the hold and we are left with 2 cases full of presents, a flashing, singing reindeer whose ears shake, flashing reindeer antlers for me to wear and a Father Xmas hat for John. All highly useful when you are sleeping overnight at the airport!!

Eventually we board the plane and Air Continental gave us a very comfortable flight although the films seemed rather old as I watched Ginger Rogers and David Niven in black and white. We finally arrived at Newark and we became hopeful knowing that there were still 3 flights to Toronto that day and we might be able to get standby tickets, but it took so long to get through security that already we had missed one flight and all the hotels were completely full, hope was fading fast.

Not one to admit defeat I went up to the Continental desk where the lady confirmed we were flying at 6.45am tomorrow. I must have looked so dejected that she took pity on us and went off to make a phone call and hey presto we are booked on the 5pm flight that night, so no sleeping on an airport bench in my reindeer antlers after all.

As we flew over Lake Ontario I never dreamt that it was so large and suddenly we were flying over the vast snowy Toronto landscape. 21 hours after leaving home we were given the warmest of welcomes and were sitting cosy and warm with my son Jonathan and his girlfriend Jaimie in their beautiful home nestling in over 2 feet of snow and we knew it was all worthwhile.

Jonathan and Jaimie's house.

After a good night's sleep in our basement bedroom complete with cinema we walked in -10C through the thick snow to Lake Ontario which in the summer is bustling with sunbathers on the beach - hence the area is called The Beaches.We walked through Kew Gardens where pure black squirrels were searching for food in the blanket of snow and headed for the wonderful smell of coffee at Starbucks Coffee Shop. As we sat in front of a roaring fire I knew that I would be sharing a white Xmas with the people I loved and the nightmare journey of the day before was long forgotten.

Jaimie making Snow Angels in the snow late last night on the way home from a wonderful meal at the Balsalm Restaurant.

I was really worried that chemo would prevent us going to Canada for Xmas, but now here I am in bed with the flu and just over a week to go before we fly.

On Wednesday I had a yoga session at my house and that night as John and I drove to the Malvern Theatre to see Cabaret the symptoms came on rapidly. The next day I frustratingly was having to ring from my sick bed to cancel all the lovely things that happen during the weeks before Xmas. I should have been shaking my tin for Macmillan in Morrison's sadly someone else had to do it. My Solihull Cancer Support Group Party was special this year because my Macmillan nurse Sue and her group were the entertainment.Yes only I could have a nurse that sings in a folk group as well. I have tried many times to hear her sing and once again I missed the chance. She also has never heard my talks where I praise her part in helping me to survive. I am sure we will both get the chance one day.

Saturday, I still felt wretched, but we are going with 2 friends to the Macmillan Ball at the St. John's Hotel, Solihull and we can't let them down, I don't feel the Belle of the Ball but I drag myself from the fireside, Strictly Come Dancing and the X Factor and with make up on, cough sweets in my evening bag I manage to keep going till 11 pm. and am so glad I made the effort, because the Macmillan Fund Raising team headed by Steve Dourass work tirelessly to help people like me.

The next day I had all my family and grandchildren to a pre christmas dinner celebration as I sadly won't be seeing them on Christmas Day. The candles were lit, the crackers were pulled and we exchanged presents and the three grandchildren went home tired but happy and their grandmothere felt the same, I'm obviously getting better!

Monday. I went with my son Justin to see Ben and Nicky in their Nativity Play, "The Whoops a Daisy Angel". It was just delightful, I hope, that in this changing world, schools never stop putting on the Story of Xmas, the children seem to love performing and there is always one that has you in tucks of laughter. Long may it continue to add to the Magic of Xmas.

Wednesday, I felt almost human again and our yoga group went to The Oak, Hockley Heath for our Xmas lunch. It has been completely renovated and what a beautiful place with excellent food and marvellous service, I can't wait to go back again.

Then John's son Mike arrived from America to stay with us for a couple of days, it is always lovely when he comes. Although he and Louise and our grandson Alexander live so far away in Washington they send so many photos on the computer of their experiences, so despite the miles we are able to share their lives.

Today we have travelled to Rutland to spend the day with John's other son Richard and family. He is a wonderful cook and we shared another happy pre Christmas dinner and the sacks of presents we bought for the children were a great success, but we are off at 5.30am tomorrow so we have packing to do. It is midnight and I have just finished after searching the loft for my reindeer antlers and John's Father Xmas hat complete with bell which he is refusing to wear, but we will see!!

Toronto is -16 degrees and it has thick snow so we are going to have a white Xmas. Each Xmas, I think how lucky I am to be here to share it with John, my family and friends and I know this will be a special one, I really hope yours is too.

The last time I wrote my blog was the 4th December, since then I have been completely pole axed with the dreaded flu bug, following a flu and pneumonia jab! I rarely ever give up or give in, but the only place for me was bed. I am now up and about again, so where was I? Ah I remember, I had been given my scan results.

Just because the diagnosis is not always what you hoped it would be, you still have to get on with life. I had a lump in my stomach that had been causing me great pain and worry. Now the scan had revealed it wasn't cancerous I booked myself in to see a colo-rectal surgeon Mr. Budhoo in the hope he could help. I paid to go privately because I didn't want to wait for months on the NHS. I am used to waiting for 2 to 3 hours outside oncologists' offices, so it was a luxury to find myself being seen by Mr. Budhoo within 15 minutes.The lump was caused by scar tissue from 2 hernia operations that I had to have following the major surgery due to ovarian cancer. He explained that it would not be advisable to open me up again and that I would have to live with it. I will try everything to sort a problem out, but if there is nothing that can be done then I do learn to live with it and that is what I will do now

I'd had enough of hospitals for one week so it was so refreshing to go out to lunch with my old BBC friends, Cheryl and Claire.The food at the Bell and Cross near Belbroughton is excellent and well worth being stuck on the M42 on a busy Friday afternoon. Luckily I managed to get back home in time to go to my grandson Ben's school fair. I even won him the last tombola prize so I gained a few Nanny brownie points!

I love Xmas, especially the build up and each year we go to the Classic Spectacular at the NIA. Our friends Debbie and Gordon came to stay the weekend and equipped with union jack flags we left the Hyatt hotel after a superb meal and walked along the canal which looks so beautiful at night to the NIA. We sang our hearts out and waved our flags furiously to Land of Hope and Glory and marvelled at the wonderful special effects and fireworks during the 1812 Overture. We are blessed to have the marvellous CBSO (City of Birmingham Symphony Orchestra) and to have so many entertainment venues in Birmingham. We left that night happy and elated after watching a wonderful show.

The next day we were off to Worcester to celebrate my friend Geoffrey's 60th Birthday party. He was a music producer in Popular Music at the BBC and I spent four of the happiest years of my BBC career working with Geoffrey. He has a wonderful dry sense of humour and gave my leaving speech when I retired due to cancer.It was great seeing old friends and colleagues that I had not seen for 7 years. I have to say that the ladies seemed to wear better then the men, but then I would wouldn't I!

After a lovely afternoon we raced back home to Solihull to go with other friends to an Old Time Music Hall at the little Dovehouse Theatre. We all sang along with the songstress, laughed continuously at the comedian's jokes - no swear words or sex, just pure unadulterated humour. Then one of the former members of the Morton Frazer Harmonica Gang came on looking incredibly young, especially as they were famous many years ago.As he played with great skill I remembered all the times my Dad played his harmonica. He died in August this year and when I went to his flat I found 15 harmonicas including a very tiny one. He always rang me up on my birthday to play me Happy Birthday, followed by The Flight of the Bumble Bee, so when this talented gentleman started to play it I could feel tears dripping down my cheeks. I guess I am going to get many of those moments, but when he started playing his tiny harmonica just like my Dad's, I realised how lucky I am so have so many wonderful memories of my special Dad.

All in all a very good week, but what a busy one. The next week proved to be different altogether.

Last Friday, John and I sat outside my Oncolgist's office for over 2 hours waiting nervously for the results of my scan. John tries to take my mind off it by asking me the answers to The Times crossword. Unfortunately my brain is reduced to a complete jelly due to my nervousness and I cannot answer a single one.

Eventually we are called and Dr Sarah Williams gives you all the time you need to assimilate what she says and to ask questions and that is so important to a cancer patient.My lymph nodes have grown and she is in two minds whether to give me chemo now. My heart sinks (a) because I so wanted to go to Canada for Xmas to spend it with my son Jonathan. ( b) for 6 months whilst having chemo treatement your quality of life changes dramatically (c) it seems that you are constantly visiting hospital and last but certainly not least I would lose my hair for the 4th time and each time it grows back it is thinner and finer than before. As you know I always try to turn negative to positive so I have to be grateful that I can still have treatment that will extend my life.

Suddenly while all these thoughts are spinning round in my head, Dr Williams says "I think we will wait till after Xmas and see you in January". I could have hugged her, but sadly for me she is leaving to have a baby and I had grown to trust her implicitly which is so important on this journey with cancer, but I wish her every happiness with her "Xmas baby".

John and I went home both feeling a bit deflated as it wasn't the news we wanted to hear and it affects both our lives. So often all the sympathy goes to the cancer patient, but our partners suffer too.To everyone else I smile and say "I feel fine" but poor John has to put up with all my moans and groans and fears.

The next day I went to Leamington Spa on the train to meet Margaret, Julia and Sue, 3 of my special girlfriends from BBC Pebble Mill. After much laughter and merriment my spirits lifted. I've beaten this cancer before, I'll jolly well beat it again I thought, thank goodness for great friends.On the night when John and I went off to a friend's party in Moseley, we were back on form again and in positive mood.

On Tuesday I went to Smooth Radio, (originally Saga Radio), their studios are on the Hagley Road, Birmingham and I was being interviewed by Nick Piercy. After spending many years working in the studios at Pebble Mill it was great fun being on the other side of the microphone. I was made to feel very welcome and Nick's easy manner was very relaxing.

I was there to talk about my relationship with my Macmillan nurse and how invaluable her help was to me.This was to promote Macmillan's "bring a £ to work" on Thursday. My interview was going out the next day, so at the unearthly hour of 7am I was listening to the Nick Piercy Show and what a great job he made of really promoting this worthwhile cause which depends so much on charity. I know cancer patients who aren't so lucky as me and don't have a Macmillan nurse in their area. It would be wonderful if one day enough money could be raised so that all cancer patients could have access to their own Macmillan Nurse- what a difference it would make to their lives.

It was just as well I was up early, the doorbell rang and there was an enormous box in the porch. My friend Margaret had sent me 2 holly trees in pots for Xmas - what a wonderful present. Apparently you have to have a male and a female holly bush so that they can produce berries - I learn something every day! I don't think they have time to produce this year, but perhaps next Xmas I will be able to pick my own holly to decorate the house. I have named them Edna and Vic after my Mom and Dad who have both died in the last 2 years, My lovely Dad died in August this year.I have entertained my family on Xmas Day for 45 years and Xmas will never be the same without them.That is why I am so thrilled that I will now be able to spend Xmas in Canada. I must remember to pack my reindeer antlers!

Monday morning was sunny and bright and as I hopped on the train to Birmingham where I was going to be presented with a cheque from Marks & Spencer, I knew this was going to be a good day.

Thanks to the generosity of the staff and management, £2,000 has been raised for Ovacome, the ovarian cancer charity which does so much to help people like me. They are always there on the end of a 'phone if you need advice or have any worries and they send out a quarterly newsletter free. One of the aims of Ovacome is to try to get ovarian cancer a higher profile so that diagnosis can be made earlier and so that less women tragically lose their lives unecessarily. They are also on steering committes to ensure that women's views are taken into account and heard.

Breast Cancer has an amazing profile and so much research and progress is being made with great results and that is wonderful. Sadly Ovarian Cancer is definitely the poor relative so for M & S to give their support to Ovacome is marvellous.

One of their staff Mary Hughes, who is a lingerie advisor, was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in October 2006. Like so many of us her early diagnosis in April was IBS(irritable bowel syndrome), as the symptoms are very similar, but sadly 6 months on Mary was told she had ovarian cancer and that it had spread..

Thus started her journey with major surgery,numerous hospital visits, chemotherapy and scans. In 2008 she was told that the cancer has returned as so often happens with this type of disease and once again she is having to go through chemotherapy.

Having met Mary I can understand why all her colleagues at M & S have supported her and raised this money on her behalf. She is a complete inspiration to them all, she is positive and retains a great sense of humour despite her illness.So with all this and the great support from her friends at M & S and her family she has all the ingredients to beat
this cancer yet again and I wish her luck. The good news is that Mary and I are going to keep in touch.

Once again I digress. I gave a speech and the cheque was presented and it was so large (just like the ones on Children in Need) my immediate thought was "how am I going to get this on the train" and then "how am I going to send this in the post to Ovacome". Silly me, of course they send a real cheque to Ovacome this was just for publicity!

The Birmingham Mail photographer, Geoffrey was there and the article was going in the Mail one day this week although I haven't seen it yet, After a lovely buffet and enjoyble company I left to catch my train home - without that enormous cheque, happy that M & S will probably do something to help us in March 2009 which is ovarian cancer month - not a lot of people know this, Thank you so much M & S Birmingham for your generosity to Ovacome and to people like Mary and me.

Tuesday was the last day of the "Macmillan Living with Cancer Course".Where have those 6 weeks gone? I lit a candle at the beginning of the session and at the end we all held hands in friendship and blew it out. There were some tears at leaving as new friends had been made and we had all become very fond of each other and helped each other. The participants had gained so much in the way of knowledge, self help and had now been able to take back control of their lives .Consequently, for Mike, my co tutor and I it was a very rewarding moment and we suggested that the group continued to meet up and support each other and this is what they are going to do.

I had 2 great days but now I was worried. I was not looking forward to Friday when I was going to see the oncolgist for the result of my scan. Hence Wednesday and Thursday I spent the time enjoying the company of my husband and friends and a little "retail therapy" to try and forget this world of cancer for a short time.

When I came out of hospital seven years ago after major surgery and I started chemo, I knew that I looked really awful with no hair, no figure,due to weight loss and no sparkle- I had definitely lost my sparkle! One day as I looked at this tired body I thought what can I do to make a difference. The only parts that seemed not to be ravaged by the disease and the chemo were my feet and hands so I made an appointment to have a manicure and pedicure.

In my previously busy working life I didn't have time for such luxuries, but when I left the hairdressers' that day with shiny bright red toe nails and finger nails I felt like a new woman and decided that a bit of pampering was not just a luxury on my journey with cancer but something that made me feel good about myself as a woman and that is so important.

Consequently, when I went last week to get my nails done for a dinner dance, I still remembered the good feel factor it gave me 7 years ago. We ladies are very bad at finding "time for ourselves" and I am the worst person at this, but we do really need and deserve this "me time".

Last week, inbetween tutoring my course,going for my scan,visiting my dentist and solicitor, I managed a yoga session, a reflexology session and my aromatherapist Ann came to our house to give three of us the benefits of her wonderful massage with the special oils she chooses for us each individually. Lavender to relax, bergamot to uplift, marjoram for pain, grapefruit for energy etc. I had felt so tired and had been having unexplained pains over the last few weeks which worried me, so I reckon I needed all those oils to work a miracle.

Way back in 2001, which seems like a lifetime away now, Lyn. my reflexologist kept mentioning that she felt I had problems in my ovaries and lungs. This was 6 months before the medical profession finally diagnosed ovarian cancer which had spread into my lung. Consequently I have a great faith in what she says. This time she said she could feel something in the right of my pelvis and in 2 areas either side of my spine. Once again she was spot on, that is where I have been experiencing pain recently. I will be interested to know what my scan shows.

Talking of scans, I kept ringing and ringing to try to get an appointment with my oncologist to discuss the results, to no avail. It is so hard, as I am sure so many cancer patients would agree, when you are really worried and you to have to wait 2 or 3 weeks to see your oncologist to learn whether you are still OK or that you will have to have the dreaded chemo again.

So many of my friends also go through the agonies of waiting and I sometimes think that this stress is what causes tiredness and of course when you have pains, as hard as you try to be positive, it is human nature to think the worst. Through being persistent I have finally and thankfully got my appointment for tomorrow. As always I am very nervous, but we will just have to wait and see and face it. I do so desperately want to go and see my son Jonathan in Canada for Xmas, but again where there is a will there is a way.

Talking of Xmas, last Saturday,I had the joy of taking my 2 grandsons, Ben and Nicholas who are 5 and 3 to see Father Xmas at Notcutts Garden Centre. Seven years ago all I wanted was to live long enough to see my first grandchild. Now I have moved the
goalposts! I think like most grandparents I have this incredibly strong feeling that I want to help protect them. I now want to see my grandchildren grow up, become young men. I want to be there when they get married. If this feeling is so strong for me as a grandparent, I can't imagine how hard it must be for young men or women with children who have to cope with cancer, but it must also make their will to live even more powerful.

I don't think I have ever really grown up and I know John would certainly confirm this. I still love birthdays - not just mine but anyone's birthdays and I still get excited over Xmas and now I have a wonderful excuse to visit Father Xmas myself.

Notcutt's have made it very special for the children (and grandparents!) with reindeer, donkeys ,goats, ducks and turkeys strutting happily around. We were having such fun and then Ben asked the question "Are these the turkeys we eat at Xmas?" How do you answer that one? In fact they both asked 101 questions about Father Xmas and you cannot destroy the magical fantasy that our parents created for us and that we in turn created for our children, so hopefully I answered all their questions and still kept them believing in the "Magic of Xmas" In fact, as we finally went in to meet a very jolly Father Xmas I almost believed it myself!

I wrote my last entry, yesterday evening complete with paragraphs and to my surprise it appears on my Blog Site as one long continuous screed which is really difficult to read. So apologies to anyone who has tried and hopefully with the help of the Birmingham Mail Blog Site expert it will be amended.

It's Thusday, 27th November and still I have not been able to contact anyone to help sort my last entry out, so thank you to anyone who has had the patience to read it. I hope my dentist Nigel has, because so often when we go to our doctor or dentist it seems that all we ever do is moan and sometimes it is good to let them know that we do appreciate all they do for us - because after all they are human too and a thank you goes such a long way.

I'm about to start my next blog, fingers crossed there are a few paragraphs this time!!

All my weeks are busy but this one has been non stop, which probably is just as well as I didn't have much time to dwell on my scan at City Hospital last Tuesday which I have been worrying about as I have symptoms and pains that I can't explain. I have been having protractive dental work since March this year. My last chemo in 2006 caused shrinkage to the gums with the result that my bridge became loose. No one tells you this can happen,but sadly it is just another possible side effect of chemo which has turned out to be a very expensive one! I have a wonderful dentist called Nigel who I have been with for 30 years and trust implicitly He told me I could not drink red wine or eat curries as they would stain the temporary bridge which I have had for 6 months. I forgot one day and after eating curried parsnip soup I woke up the next morning and to my horror these bright yellow teeth were smiling back at me in the bathroom mirror! This week I finally have my permanent bridge and I can now eat curry and drink red wine to my heart's content! With shiny new teeth in place off I went for lunch at the Ginny Ring Craft Centre in Hanbury with my Yoga teacher Gill and my friend Kay.We have been friends since childhood and she lives in a beautiful cottage in the woods and as I drove through them the remaining leaves on the trees were a spectacular blood red and where they had fallen it was like a carpet of crimson. If only I had my camera. I am blessed with many friends, some I have made since I had cancer. My friend Wendy, is also my healer and John and I were invited to dinner last Saturday, Her husband Ray is one of the few surviving Spitfire Pilots of World War II and what tales he has to tell. My favourite evening is a candlelit dinner at home with good friends. Well we had the candles and they certainly did us proud with a wonderful meal and great company. Before I knew it Tuesday had arrived - the day of my scan, but I also had my "Living with Cancer course" to run and I always say that helping other people helps you to forget your own problems, so off I went to Sutton Coldfield where I am always inspired by the courage of these people and encouraged by how they have all gained so much from this course, hence a little scan was not going to stop me. All too soon I was heading for the Jewellery Quarter Birmingham to pick up my lovely husband John who had caught the train from Solihull so he could be with me. He has spent hour upon hour over the last 7 years waiting with me in hospitals for scans, results, chemo etc. and never once has he complained - well not very often!! Just having someone there with you is so comforting and I value his support so much - hope he reads this, 'cause I don't always tell him enough! I always say a little prayer as I go through the CT scanner in my hospital pyamas made to fit a 6ft hefty man not a 5ft 4ins small lady, but this is no time for vanity and the kindness of the staff makes such a difference to your experience . Finally 8 hours after leaving home that morning, tired and weary we arrive back at 7pm, but no rest for the wicked. I have a ladies' Rotary supper to attend in Balsall Common. It is so easy to think "I'm too tired,I can't be bothered." I never do that mainly because I don't like letting people down, but also I'm so grateful to still be alive that I embrace every opportunity to enjoy everything that comes my way. The spirit's always willing but sometime this poor body trails behind. As I drove home at midnight down the dark country lanes to Solihull listening to Radio 4 I thought "that was another lovely evening spent with friends" and the stresses of the day just melted away.