July 2009 Archives

I have always thought that the lop-sided extradition treaty we signed with the USA - the one where our rights are regarded as being much less important than those of Americans - was just part of Tony Blair's job application ready for the time when being Prime Minister had served its purpose.

Latest victim is Gary McKinnon, the bloke with Asperger's Syndrome who hacked into the most sensitive US defence and intelligence computers from a cheapo PC in a back bedroom using a dial up modem. Remember? Those whistling things that took a day and a half to download a half meg photo?

The safety of the free world does not seem quite so secure when you find you can get into the innermost sanctum of the US defence and security systems with a cheap PC from the local computer shop and a ten quid modem does it?

Anyhow despite the fact the crimes were committed here the US wants to try him there using the extradition treaty signed supposedly to aid the fight against terror (the only ones not extradited seem to be terrorist suspects but that is another tale) with a 70 year jail term looming.

This is a guy who, let us be honest, is not quite the full shilling. Remember, he was hacking into the US secret super computers to find proof of aliens.

The Government, as usual, are happy to jump through hoops if the US snaps its fingers, so poor old Gary is being thrown to the wolves, despite the fact the crimes were committed in the UK and discovered three years before the extradition treaty was signed. As I understand it the US have yet to ratify the treaty but are still quite happy to use it if it suits them.

As it stands if we want a US citizen we have to prove in a US court that there is a strong case to answer. If the US want one of our citizens they basically have to just chuck us a name and we put them on a plane - unless of course they happen to want a suspected terrorist living on legal aid and benefits in the UK when the rules seem to change but that is New Labour for you.

The Daily Mail, always quick to jump on a bandwagon, is claiming it is behind the campaign to try him here, despite the fact others, including Private Eye, had been fighting long before the Mail took an interest, but no matter, at least they have raised awareness and are driving the cause onward.

After running out of legal moves to prevent a US trial it now comes down to either shaming this spineless Government to stand up for one of its own citizens or convincing the Americans that justice will not be served by extradition.

If you want to express some concerns to the US then start with the top man, President Obama. You can email him by clicking here. Meanwhile it might hurt a little - but not as much as 70 years in a US jail - but you can also help by signing the Daily Mail petition here or by signing a petition to the US Congress by clicking here.
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You can also help by contacting your MP, you can find a list of all MPs and links to send an email by clicking here. If you have other moans stick to Gary first and then send a second missive - keeping it civilised please - about any other points you want to raise.

No one is saying Gary is a hero and he does have a case to answer but let's keep it in proportion and let him answer his case in this country.

This idea of a tax on parking spaces has been kicking around since the Transport Act of 2000, just waiting for a council with a death wish to try it. It comes down to a tax on jobs and industry which will either put prices up for all of us as firms pass on extra costs or, much more likely, will result in redundancies with costs taken from the wages of remaining staff who use a parking space.

It will encourage firms to dispense with parking spaces which means staff will be parking in nearby streets or firms will move to areas where they are not taxed for trying to provide employment.

This is just another way of raising revenue with claims it will encourage public transport just a smokescreen. Public transport in this country is a shambles. The public it serves are the shareholders and owners while prices are the highest in any civilised country despite being paid subsidies that would have virtually financed British Rail as a free service.

So how about picking a date, let's say Monday, October 5, and calling it National Public Transport day. And on that day everyone in the country leaves their car at home and travels to work by public transport. Then Ministers can tell us all just how good and efficient our transport system really is.

Back in April the old Met Office told us we were in for a barbeque summer - which they revised this week to a barbeque summer as long as the barbeque was under cover and you wore wellies and a life jacket.

The interesting thing was that the fact they got it so woefully wrong surprised no one. It was just accepted that weather forecasting is like that. If they tell you it will be sunny then take a brolly. All of which begs the question why do so many people stand in awe of all the pseudo science cobblers spouted under the umbrella of global warming.

If our scientists can't even predict the weather five months ahead why do we think that they are going to be accurate when they tell us what we are in for not five months but five decades hence.

There is no proof whatsoever that CO2 production has any measurable effect on global warming yet stick green in front of anything these days and it is an excuse to up prices, create new professions and industries - with yet another explosion of parasitic consultants - fund endless, mindless research projects and, most attractive of all to those in power, create a new derivative market in carbon emissions trading along with a new raft of environmental taxes which we can be told are all for our own good. The fact they swell treasury coffers is merely a happy coincidence.

So next time some scientist tries to justify his research grant or puts down his marker for a knighthood by telling us we are all doomed unless we mend our ways and pay our green taxes - remember the barbeque summer.

So if the Government's Food Standards Agency has pronounced that organic food is no healthier and no better for us than non-organic - so what is in it for Gordon's lot?

The current Government never does or says anything without some cunning stunt lurking in the background so you have to wonder what policy, favour or promised donation to party funds is lurking in the shadows.

As for the report itself it is rather like telling us that the sun comes up in the morning. Anyone who knows that plants should be planted green side up should be able to tell you that plants do not care if their nutrients come from specially imported fermented Peruvian Llama droppings composted with fruit bat guano or from a smelly chemical factory in Widnes.

Complex organic feeds break down in the soil while industrially produced chemicals are already in the simple form, or close to it, that plants need to be able to absorb them as a solution.

Anyone knows you can produce a decent crop of veg hydroponically, without any soil or organic matter at all feeding the plants a stream of chemicals. So to tell us that organic and non-organic veg contain basically the same amounts of nutrients is hardly earth shattering. Plants take what they need and if they run short you have a poor crop.

Missing from the FSA study though was any figures for levels of trace elements, residual pesticides and any environmental impact not to mention any differences in taste.

Many of the fruit and veg on supermarket shelves have been bred and grown to produce a heavy yield of uniform, attractive fruit or veg with a long shelf life. Flavour never enters the equation. They are routinely sprayed against pests and fed according to a timetable rather than need and they are then picked to order.

The method produces cheap and plentiful food with bland flavour - keep it bland and there is not a lot for people to like, or more importantly, dislike.

The cheap food though is likely to contain residual pesticide and fungicide, which was not measured in the study, while the excessive use of fertilisers washes off to pollute rivers and watercourses, which again went unrecorded.

In addition heavy production is turning the soil in many fields into infertile deserts which now need dosing with chemicals to grow anything.

Organic growing with green and animal manure, organic feeds and so on produces a healthy soil full of bacteria, fungus, nematodes and humus. The soil is fertile and a healthy population of everything from worms to bacteria break down soil particles to release nutrients and trace elements.

So just to tell us that organic and non-organic produce contain the same nutrients is hardly earth shattering so we will have to wait to see why it seemed so important to tell us.

One of my readers - Andrew - wondered if I had any idea about where winding treacle on bobbins comes from - the phrase that is, not the occupation? It seems the only two entries on Google (now three of course) come from moi!! Which I suppose makes me the world expert on treacle winding.

It was just one of those phrases I grew up with in Oldham, one of the last mill towns in Lancashire* before the Pennines resisted any further human development. Oldham does lay claim to some words unique to the town, such as slippy curry for an ice slide, but whether treacle winding originated there or in the area of towns and villages nestled on the edge the Pennines in both Lancashire and Yorkshire I have no idea.

It came with other descriptive phrases such as "a nose like a blind cobbler's thumb" for someone with an injured snout or just a plain old ugly nose, or "one eye's a lolly and the others trying t'lick it" for someone who was cross eyed or boss eyed as it was up t'North.

Anyone daydreaming or not paying attention was likely to be asked "are you wi us or wit' mission?" - a reference to the many outings by the non-conformist churches, missions and brotherhoods which occupied every other street corner in Northern towns. Any local beauty spot, fair or day tripper destination would have its fair share of visitors on mission outings with any frineds you met there likely to be part of some group or other.

My parents were members, on the committee no less, of Higginshaw Brotherhood where my mother ran the Sunday School for a while. The brotherhood was an offshoot of the Methodists, a part of the Christian religion which had more varieties then Heinz in Northern towns.

"You'll end up winding treacle on bobbins" or "end up wheeling daylight into dark rooms" were favourite phrases of Dubby Barlow who was an elderly chemistry teacher at Counthill Grammar School, an establishment that tried hard to educated me.

Another of his favourites was "you'd be better off sitting eggs than sitting exams" aimed at anyone having a bad lesson. This was in the days of course when science had not been neutered by 'elf 'n' safety and still involved real chemicals, explosions, horrendous smells, naked flames while physics still used mains electricity and we played with high voltages making sparks shoot from our fingers and hair stand on end.

We even had a visiting Prof who used to come round once a year with flasks of liquid nitrogen and oxygen along with a bag of gunpowder to give us a lecture on explosives. 'Elf 'n' safety would have had a real attack of the vapours over that one. Happy days.

Meanwhile, if anyone else has any odd but apt sayings from their home towns or their youth then let us know.

"Lancastrians don't have Greater Manchester - that's just a place for politicians and bureaucrats to ponce about in - in the real world Manchester is merely a city in south east Lancashire.

Now just supposing someone like Roy of the Rovers had been charged with, I don't know, let's say for the sake of argument, affray, after pummelling someone in a night club like a latter day Bombardier Billy Wells.

I don't think the bit about justice being seen to be done would have stood up to scrutiny that well if the trial had been held at Melchester Crown Court just as the new season starts up.

The Steven Gerrard case throws up a bit of a dilemma. No one who didn't sit through the entire case hearing every scrap of evidence can really know if they would have agreed or disagreed with the jury.

Remember Gerrard supposedly received threats when there was talk of him moving to Chelsea so did it run through the mind of jurors that if they were responsible for him missing half the season or more because he was playing for Lags XI they might not be first in line for Freedom of the City? It is all pressure that should not be there.

To try the Liverpool skipper, the local hero, in his home city just before the start of the new season raises doubts that should not be anywhere near the case after a not guilty verdict.

It would have been so much better for justice and for Gerrard if the case had been held somewhere away from Liverpool and any of the cities of their Premiership rivals, such as Manchester or London. Somewhere such as Shrewsbury or Worcester would have meant not guilty meant just that with no suspicion of home advantage or reservations about the verdict.

I have no idea whether we have enough helicopters in Afghanistan. Like most people my only knowledge of what is going on out there comes from the Press and TV.

As some of the Press are almost political organs for one party or another and the BBC, under New Labour, has become virtually a state broadcaster, even that information cannot be relied on as completely accurate with no embellishment or omission. These days there are agendas everywhere.

When we get a former minister responsible for the region, Lord Malloch-Brown, saying we don't have enough helicopters followed by No 10 issuing "clarification" on "misrepresentation" of what he said - which is New Labour speak for he might have said it and it might of been reported accurately and might even be true but it is not what he meant to say - then the feeling in the old water grows.

As a rule of thumb if you work on the basis that active politicians caught out telling the truth are probably only doing it because they thought it was a lie then you can't go far wrong.

Whether the wars in Iraq or Afghanistan are right or wrong is irrelevant. Whether we like it or not the Government sent our troops out there to fight in our name so we have a responsibility to give them the best chance of coming home alive that we can.

So when it comes to if we enough helicopters who would you rather believe the generals and commanders trying to keep their men alive and the lads on the ground fighting to survive - the professional soldiers who know what they have been asked to do and what they need to do it - or those wonderful people who brought you Iraq, weapons of mass destruction, 45 minute warnings, dodgy dossiers and who even decided Dr Kelly committed suicide without having to resort to anything so tedious as an inquest.

Easy decision really.

I wonder if there is some sort of mailing list for the Jones's. I know we are all supposed to keep up with them but how do the Jones's know what the next thing we are supposed to be aspiring to actually is.

We had designer bedrooms which was a bit short-lived, which I suspect had something to do with it being a room visitors don't normally visit - unless you run a brothel, or brotel as they are known in the better suburbs. Not a lot of one-upmanship in a room people don't see. Then designer bathrooms became the new rock and roll or new black or whatever followed by designer kitchens - preferable sourced from a manufacturer sounding as foreign as possible in styles such as shaker, modern, ultra-modern, traditional and so on.

I must admit I have never quite understood the term designer anything. It is like architect built houses - as if the rest of us live in homes thrown up to a plan knocked up on the back of an envelope by the local greengrocer.

So while the Jones's have their designer kitchens the rest of us have to make do with our flat pack jobs that were supposed to be dining room tables, or sheds or pergolas or whatever until someone - not a designer of course - decided you could probably get them to look like a kitchen if you screwed them up a bit differently..

And as all the instructions seem to be written by someone with no DIY knowledge who learned English on an internet correspondence course run by someone who has never been outside Minsk but who once had a pen pal from Sheffield who was trying to learn Russian - then you just need to stick kitchen on the label and away you go.

Meanwhile the latest trend from the Jones's, following on from block paved drives, seems to be imposing walls on the boundary of their properties which announce wealth, importance and security - until you reach the end of the wall of course and find you can walk around it as it is just a frontage merely for show.

And if you have the wall and ornate gates next on the list is electronic openers so that you press a button or - even better - the gates recognise your approach automatically and start to open which, eventually, brings me to my point.

Why are so many of the Jones' clan so frightened of appearing to surrender a square centimetre of land that they stick their gates virtually on the pavement?

I followed a car yesterday that indicated right then sat in the middle of an empty road waiting for their gates - which must have been running on a couple of penlight batteries - to slowly, painfully, slowly open so the car could drive in.

Blow me, on my return, same gate, same car, same driver sitting in the middle of the road waiting to turn left into the drive while the hamster in its wheel opened the gate. . Now had they set the gates back from the road then they would not have had to cause an obstruction every time they came home but that would have meant losing a few feet of land and someone might come along and nick it.

Perhaps this Government, which runs at more than one new law a day, could manage a planning law that gates had to be a minimum of two feet and a car's length from the edge of the road.

The cynic in me wonders if New Labour's plans for reforming the Lords, particularly the bit about peers being able to resign so they can stand again as an MP has anything to do with the return of a certain Peter Mandelson riding out of the moonset from Brussels like a knight in matt black armour to spread a little darkness over the land.

Since the now Lord Mandelson arrived to be festooned in every title left in the toy box as Gordon's enforcer we have seen a drift towards Brussels, his close friend Tony Blair announced as Britain's candidate for President of Europe and now a move to allow him to resign his unelected seat in the Lords just before the next election to no doubt fight a rock solid Labour seat so he can be reinvented as an MP - a seat no doubt vacated by a compliant son of the party pensioned off to the reformed upper house.

Win or lose he will be back plotting at the centre of Labour power instead of pulling strings in the Lords.

Just when you think that this Government can't sink any lower they manage to surprise you.

Now, it seems, if you are the victim of a violent crime, and have committed a criminal offence at some point yourself, you will have any payment from the Criminal Injuries Compensation Authority slashed to save a few bob here and there.

Perhaps someone can tell me the link between a young mum fined for speeding at 35 in a 30 area because she thought the limit was 40 and then the same young mum, a couple of years later takes a wrong turn and ends up being gang raped by a bunch of teenage thugs because she happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

A simple speeding fine could cut anything from £1,350 to £3,375 off the maximum payout of £13,500 for gang rape and the only logic in that seems to be to save a few quid from treasury coffers. Whoever thought that little beauty up should hang their head in shame and any minister who approved it should resign.