Little Teds - How do parents manage to trust anyone?
It's no small wonder that every parent in the land isn't a nervous wreck, driven to distraction by paranoia and worry about the safety of their kids.
All those parents who have to leave their child in the care of others while they go to work will be feeling especially anxious now. Whenever the subject of Little Teds nursery in Plymouth is mentioned amongst my mom friends, there is silence for a moment, and the empty look of shock. We all feel sick to our stomachs that people are capable of such crimes, and that someone has had the opportunity to commit them.
And what will happen to the alleged perpetrator of these alleged crimes? There is not a fellow Brummie Mum who I have spoken to who doesn't think that death is far too good for her. General consensus is that she'll be given the treatment she deserves in prison, yet actually many thousands of pounds will be spent on protecting this woman.
After something like this comes to light it becomes even more difficult for parents to think about leaving their baby with anyone.
Yes, we need to be mindful as there are some pretty suspect characters in all walks of life and need to protect our kids accordingly, but it's all too easy to be dragged into a mire of doubt and suspicion.
All you can do is use your common sense and go with your gut instinct about people and places. Make decisions about where to send your children based on careful research and if possible personal recommendation. Always have an open dialogue with as many of the nursery staff as possible, not because you're trying to trick them into a confession or you suspect them or negligence or untoward behaviour, but to work with them to make sure your baby is happy and supported both there and at home.
By all means worry, because worry is part and parcel of becoming a parent, but don't beat yourself up, wrack yourself with guilt or blow everything out of proportion. Remember what happened in Plymouth is extreme, to say the least; the vast, vast majority of people working with kids are honest, committed and caring individuals.
We feel for all the parents who had children in Little Teds, and hope that they start to move forward after this massive betrayal of trust.
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Emma Deadman - is a first-time mum-to-be. She gives her take on life... from bump to beyond.
This really bothers me, any crime against a child should result in severe punishment, and in my eyes our justice system is extremely poor when it comes to punishing these sadistic animals, and as a result we are failing hundreds of vulnerable kids every year!
I hope now (if it is not already happening) there is a review with regards to the use of mobile phones (and other such equipment) for all those working with kids. I know it might sound a little over the top, and that the majority of those working with kids are decent, caring individuals, however i am one of those parents who will worry sick about the care my child receives when he eventually goes to nursery/school, and would therefore like to see every measure possible put in place to prevent this sort of abuse happening again.
A nursery nurse would soon be pulled up and questioned if caught bringing a camcorder into a nursery, so what is the difference, when mobile phones nowadays are just as well equipped for taking/recording images?
I am not suggesting mobile phones should be prohibited, but surely some type of control is required?
Shocking though this case is, the wider context needs to be considered.
Making new, draconian rules is punishing the many for the crimes of the few. It is making us a risk-averse culture where good, wholesome activities are stopped because of overinflated fears (e.g. no school trips in case someone gets injured and sues). This is not good for children! It will drive good people away from professions that need them (e.g. it is hard to get social workers now - will nursery workers be next?).
Yes, the Ted thing was terrible, but as Laura says, there isn't a large-scale abuse thing going on so it needs a proportional response. Banning mobile phones? Where will it end? Do we want more of a police state than we have already?
The desire to punish is understandable but exacting revenge won't stop the same thing happening again. Many of those who abuse were abused themselves...something is needed to break the cycle?
Hmmm..I don't know BG. I would actually be happier sending my child to a nursery where I knew the staff were not allowed to have mobile phones/cameras on them around the children. Perhaps that is a knee jerk reaction, but if it makes parents feel more comfortable, maybe it's for the best?