Results tagged “Living with Cancer Course” from Birmingham Mail - I Will Survive

A month has gone by since I last wrote, but I'm still here and feeling energised by this wonderful Spring weather and the joy of watching the spring flowers and blossoms burst forth and the sounds of busy amorous birds.Our 2 bird boxes have now been claimed by blue tits and a blackbird couple and a robin seem to have taken up permanent residence in our garden.I'm always planting and pruning and it feels such a happy garden, if only I had the time to relax and enjoy it. That must be my new goal for this summer

I lived in my previous house for 20 years and my next door neighbour was a lovely lady called Stella. When she left I used to visit her and she was always interested in "my boys" and my cat Chloe who she loved. I was going to see her before Xmas but I had to cancel and she was disappointed. "I shall come and see you again soon" I said. As I sat at her funeral 2 weeks ago, how I regret not making the time to see her for now it is too late. I shall never make that mistake again.

I have always been lucky with my neighbours and we invited our great friends Thelma and Leno, who were my neighbours 40 years ago,to a "cinema evening" at our house to see "Mama Mia" - what a happy good feel factor that film leaves you with.

Talking of good feel factors on the 24th February I started the first session of "The Living with Cancer Course" run by Macmillan at Coventry.I always do a great deal of work beforehand because it is so important. My co-tutor Mike and I are a good team and we were pleased to see 14 people turn up. They all looked worried and uncertain about their future. Three weeks on the difference is amazing, they are making action plans, taking control of their lives and daring to hope and more importantly they are helping each other.I always come home exhausted, but it is one of the most rewarding things I have ever done.On the first day I had an hour to turn myself round and go with my friend Debbie to see "El Divo" at the NEC.What a wonderful night, it's amazing how 4 handsome, gifted men can revitalise you again!

That week my friend Steve Dourass from Macmillan brought the latest member of their fundraising team, James to meet my "old" Macmillan nurse and friend Sue and myself.What a joy to be able to entertain Sue to tea and cakes again - just like old times and for all of us to discuss how we fit into the "Grand Plan". It is very good when the men at the top take the time to find out what happens at "the coal front". We all learn so much from tthese meetings and share stories and laughter which help us to help others.

The weekend was upon us and John and I had such a special treat in store - our friends John and Kay had arranged a night with dinner in the best room at the best hotel in Llandudno.Kay and I have been friends for 60 years and this was my 65th birthday present.No one could have given me anything more special, John and I both love Llandudno, we always feel well and happy there and I believe the sea is very therapeutic.

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We arrived at the Osborne Hotel and were shown to our beautiful suite decorated in Victorian style complete with a fire in the old Victorian fireplace. The next morning we sat having breakfast in our room, overlooking the sea, with a friendly seagull perched on the window ledge hoping for a croissant, I thought how lucky I am to still be here to experience all these wonderful things and when our friends Carol and Val, who live in Llandudno, knocked on our bedroom to have a cup of tea with us I felt just like Hyacinth Bouquet.

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We left Llandudno refreshed and happy after 2 glorious sunny days there thanks to special friends like Kay and John whose generosity had made it all possible.

On Monday after a day spent preparing for my course, I went for a well earned Yoga class at Solihull Hospital. Gill is an amazing yoga teacher. When I was first diagnosed in 2001 and couldn't breathe properly or walk very far because of the cancerous fluid in my lung she came to see me and taught me how to breathe from my abdomen and gradually with her help I learnt ways to breathe through my lungs.A friendship was formed and she began teaching and helping other cancer patients at my house. On sunny Summer days we held the classes in the garden surrounded by the smell of lavender and roses and we all found how much it improved our well being and more importantly we had fun.Gill is such a busy lady now that those days are gone, but I am so lucky to be able to still gain from her knowledge and her friendship. If you have a problem - she will have an exercise to sort it! She has been very important to me on this journey with cancer.

Next day, just before going to do my Living with Cancer Course, an envelope arrived from City hospital. I can recognise them a mile off and always dread what I will find inside.This was not good news, my cancer level has gone up and if my scan shows something next week then the oncolgist said it might be time to institute further treatment - meaning the dreaded chemo. I have had 2 years without it and have felt absolutely wonderful and can only presume that my immune system has kept the cancer at bay.

In July my father had a stroke and I spent every day with him at Heartlands Hospital Stroke Unit for a month. When he died at the end of August, I was both exhausted and sad . He was 92 and one of life's characters. I have been lucky to have him share my life for so long, but how I miss him. I often wonder if this is when the cancer creeps up on you again, but, I hadn't got time to feel sorry for myself, I had a course to give in Sutton Coldfield, so off I went in my car trying to convince myself "It will be fine".

This is the 4th week of the course and the change in the group is amazing.On the 1st day there were tears, now there is laughter. They were frightened and unsure of the future, now they are positive and making plans.The cancer has not changed, but their attitude to it has and they are now taking control of their lives unstead of letting others take control and that is such a powerful thing to learn.They are a wonderful group of people who all help each other and I have loved being able to help them thanks to Macmillan. I always say that Macmillan keep me much to busy to die, so long may it last!

Thursday, 30th October 2008

I am the "new girl" on the block - or should I say on the blog!

Seven years ago I would never have believed I would be writing my own blog. In April 2001, I was diagnosed with Stage 4 terminal ovarian cancer, it had spread to my lung and I was given a year to live. My life changed in a split second forever.As I lay in that hospital bed I was full of despair with no hope and no future, The wonderful life I had known, the career I loved, the family and friends I treasured were slipping away from me and I was lost.

What I did not know at that time was that the will to live can be an incredibly powerful thing and when I eventually left hospital, a pale shadow of my former self, I decided that I had too much to live for, I was too young, I had 2 wonderful sons, beloved parents of 86, a man I loved, I wasn't going to leave them without a fight. So one day in May as I sat in my garden with the sun shining, the birds singing and the heady scent of May blossom pervading the air, I made a decision that I would do whatever it took to win this battle for life.

The journey I was about to take was to prove frightening, unpredictable, painful and full of uncertainties and unknowns, but the people I have met who have helped and befriended me, the experiences and challenges that came my way, have changed me forever and my life is so much richer for it. Perhaps I can share with you some of my adventures, the tricks of the trade that have helped me through 3 chemos and how helping other cancer patients and giving something back has given me a real purpose to live for.

It is hard for me to know where to begin, so perhaps I should start with right now.
After a wonderful weekend entertaining the family, John my husband and I went to bed exhausted but happy. Early Monday morning the doctor rang to say my most recent blood test showed that my cancer marker had gone up and I was bordering on anaemia. Not the best start to the week especially as I felt full of energy and had a busy week ahead. I am due to see my oncologist next Monday and the days before are very worrying. Will she will decide I need more chemo or will she give me a reprieve and continue to monitor me as she has been doing since October 2007 when cancer was found in my lymph nodes? I live my life in 3 month periods between hospital check ups and I live it to the full - it is much too precious to waste a minute of it!

I am tutoring a "Living with Cancer Course" sponsored my Macmillan over the next 6 weeks and I had work to do for it on Monday, so I concentrated on that instead of dwelling on the gloomy blood level. Nevertheless I take everything to do with my body very seriously, you just cannot afford to do otherwise when you have cancer, so a quick trip to the chemist for iron tablets was required.

On Tuesday, equipped with flip charts, books, biscuits and tissues - they are very necessary!, I drove from Solihull to Sutton Coldfield Cancer Support Group to give the course with my co- tutor, Mike. We have 13 people who are looking for ways to help themeselves take control of their lives whilst living with cancer and chemo. This course covers so many tools and methods that I have already learnt the hard way along my journey with cancer and it helps you not to just "Live with cancer" but to "LIve life well despite the cancer". I only wished it had been there when I was first diagnosed, but I feel so privileged to be helping people in this way and by doing so, I actually forget that I have the illness myself. The group of people are so enthusiastic and are already forming friendships and helping each other and the reason Macmillan have tutors with cancer is because we can relate and understand what they are going through because we have been there.

When we left at 4pm to our surprise the ground was thick with snow and thus began the slow journey back home which took twice as long as usual. What a relief to come back to a warm fire and a hot cup of tea, but soon I was trudging round my garden in the snow and dark covering all my geranium plants with bubble wrap to save them from the frost so they can see another Summer! Then after a hot shower, batteries recharged, I went out to dinner with a friend in Knowle. As I went to bed that night I thought "that was a rewarding day well spent".