Abi Clancy and a whole lotta heart

"He's big, he's blue, his girlfriend's tasty too, Peter Crouch..."

31st January 2004, Walkers Stadium Leicester. A glorious 5-0 rout and the beginning of the end for Peter Crouch at Villa.

Crouch returns with yet another club tomorrow having already been given a fine reception with Southampton and (rather less so) with Liverpool.

Sold for £2million. Yes.... that's £2 million. A year on the south coast and that became £7 million. A couple of years on Merseyside and that rose to £9 million and quite possibly eventually £11million.

30 England caps or thereabouts and a Champions League Final in the kit bag.

Oh dear. And you thought the £6 million spent on Bosko Balaban represented poor business.

That day at Leicester Crouch got two of the five second half goals Villa blitzed past Ian Walker in 18 minutes.

His partnership with Darius Vassell worked an absolute treat- a mirror-image if you like of the 'big-man, little man' combination that he is enjoying with Jermain Defoe.

A week later though David O'Leary brought back Juan Pablo Angel and Crouch was left on the bench against Leeds for all but the final four minutes of a 2-0 win.

If Crouch didn't know it before, and if he didn't read that the writing was on the wall following his loan spell at Norwich, then he certainly knew that night that his time at Villa was on the wane.

Has anyone yet held their hands up to say that Villa should never have done business with Southampton back in July 2004? Nope. Of course not.

It will be good to see Crouch again. Always a very likeable man. I wonder if Abigail Clancy will be at Villa Park? She could manage it after a morning's shopping in the Bullring.

Saw her on Jonathan Ross the other week. Thought she put Stevie Wonder in the shade.

Stop Crouch and Defoe and you've got a chance.

I've noticed Steve Sidwell's comments that the key to winning the battle on Saturday will be in getting the better of Lassana Diarra.

From what I was told by the local reporter down in Portsmouth yesterday he might have to shift his targets as Diarra is out through injury.

Speaking of the official site, I like the idea of a poll to find the ultimate player.

Martin Laursen has pipped Dion Dublin and Andy Gray to find the best header of a ball.

Garry Thompson would have won that one hands down for me.

Next up is a player with the best heart. My shortlist? Eric Djemba-Djemba has to be on there for spending his wages on gambling, big cars and clothes. (errrrrrm..... like professional footballers do, actually)

Alpay would be on there for that season and a-half after the 2002 World Cup when self-deluded fame from being named in the tournament's dream FIFA squad quickly went to his head.

But the winner has to be David Unsworth for his commitment to the cause. Forced to make one reluctant appearance for Villa Reserves he was shipped off to Everton after a month blaming his wife's homesickness.

"He was told he'd got to be home by one o'clock, or his dinner would be in the bin," an appalled John Gregory explained to the press.

PS: Can anyone tell me the final score of this coming Saturday's Championship clash between Bristol City and Norwich? My mate told me it's going to be 1-0 at half-time and 4-3 on the whistle.